kara_el (kara_el) wrote in caregiving,

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Update on Mom

Hi everyone! Spring is coming in lovely here.
Mom has gone downhill a bit, but ,so far she is still her funny cute self, just seeing things that aren't there and talking back to the TV.
Seriously, at this point if I don't laugh, I'll cry -- and I've cried quite a lot lately.
What gets me is you get used to the New Behaviors -- wrapping random things in kleenex and insisting her items of clothing she's had for years aren't hers. Then she starts to dissect her food and you figure out that she thinks anything with texture is paper or rocks or glass or bugs -- -- and before you are used to that, she starts to wake up early in the morning and you discover her naked sitting on her bed and her nightgown is a wet soiled mass on the floor of the shower.

Now, I have a thing about poop -- I am almost paranoid about poop germs and now I have to steel myself to clean up random smears. Never mind that it's my own Mother -- that does my head in.
I have to get some plastic gloves tomorrow.
And do some retail therapy -- new towels sound nice.

Oh, girls, if this entry sounds flippant, -- it's just that things have moved real fast in the last month -- Mom is on the next plateau, as our case manager calls it. The dementia has progressed and I had to make the really tough decision to put her on the list for long-term care. It was a heart-breaking decision, but the stress levels at home are through the roof for all of us -- even with a great PCW, and my sisters and nieces helping.

It's just that every day is scary now -- I fear the next drop in her ability to recognize us and her world.
She had no idea Sunday was mother's day, even though we wished her well over and over and by now her gifts are forgotten -- she thought it was her birthday for a while -- tonight it was Christmas.

Then Mom comes back for a moment and compensates by saying -- Oh, I was kidding, or I know that, do you think I'm senile?
No, Mom, I don't.
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